


Hi, Hey There, Hello

by usernicole



Category: One Direction (Band), Radio 1 RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff, M/M, just absolute fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-31
Updated: 2014-10-31
Packaged: 2018-02-23 08:57:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2541824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/usernicole/pseuds/usernicole
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis can talk to animals. Nick can't, but he tries anyway. Louis likes that in a guy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hi, Hey There, Hello

**Author's Note:**

> hiya!! so i made [a post](http://super-liam.tumblr.com/post/100769208551/okay-but-fic-where-louis-can-talk-to-animals-and) after watching steal my girl and i liked the idea so much that i wrote it. 
> 
> this is fluff. this is the most mindless, ridiculous fluff. 
> 
> DISCLAIMERS! 1. i don't know anything about animals. i'm sorry but i don't. what even are they? i have four dogs. who are those guys? where did they come from? who knows? not me. the most research i did was i looked up some videos of hedgehogs being angry. it was adorable. 2. this is UNBRITPICKED. i asked my beta to tell me if i sounded like a fake british person but she was like "i am not a british person" and i'm too scared to ask a real one. if i sound like a fake british person just know that i am a real american person and i am sorry. 3. i've never seen breaking bad. i'm a fraud. everything in this about that show comes secondhand
> 
> MUCH THANKS AND LOVE to my good friend [nia](http://waroftheposes.tumblr.com) who beta'd this even if she asked me when harry was going to make out with nick like every four seconds and told me that having a dog call another dog hot was too much.
> 
> don't repress pig's sexuality, nia
> 
> hope u like it!
> 
> ALSO! fezpo made this [beautiful art](http://1dezpo.tumblr.com/post/103448719773/nick-and-pig-with-louis-and-eli-taking-a-stroll) inspired by this fic, and u should all go and check it out and her other art as well! :)

The first time an animal talked to Louis, he was eleven and his sister’s hamster called him an asshole.

He looked around, even though he was sure there was no one in the room with them, considering he was in the process of hiding Snuffles’ cage in his closet. “Um, what?” he said, staring down at the cage.

“I said you’re an asshole, asshole,” the hamster said, though his mouth wasn’t moving, nose twitching in the way that earned him his name. His tiny, beady eyes did look a bit fierce, though. “I’m a living creature, you know. I don’t like being locked up in closets.”

“You’re the asshole,” Louis said indignantly, if a bit weakly. He sat down in front of the cage, leaning in to look inside curiously. “Have you always been able to talk?”

“ _Obviously_ , dickhead, you just never paid attention before,” Snuffles said, shuffling around in his little wood chips. “Now are you going to take me back to Lottie’s room?”

“She poured pink nail polish all over my cleats,” Louis said, frowning.

“So you torture her pet? Real mature,” Snuffle said, flattening himself down in the little hole he’d dug for himself. “Aren’t you supposed to be her _big brother?_ ”

“Stop trying to make me feel bad,” Louis said. “You spend all your time running in a wheel.”

“And you spend all your time waiting for your mom to go to work so you can sneak her laptop into your room and watch porn,” Snuffles said. He crawled up to the side of the cage, gripping the bars with his little hands. “That’s the thing about me, Louis. I’m a _watcher_ , an observer. _I know all your secrets_.” His nose twitched threateningly.

“Um,” Louis said, suddenly nervous. “Okay.”

“Now take me to my ball. I feel like going for a walk.”

 

Now, twelve years later, Louis’ gotten a bit used to the whole talking to animals thing. And it’s not as _Harry Potter_ as it sounds, honestly. Once animals know you can understand them, they never shut up.

“And one other thing,” Louis’ chimpanzee Eli says angrily. “Are we just going to ignore the misogynistic language used by Aaron Paul in the show? Because he’s _cute_? It’s bad enough the entire internet likes to vilify Skyler White, but we’re going to just throw around the word _bitch_ like it’s okay?”

“Eli, listen, chill,” Louis says, laying back in the sunlight. It was a nice day, so Louis thought it would be a good idea to take Eli to the park and lie around a bit. So far, though, all Eli had done was rant about _Breaking Bad_. “You’re a monkey, and you’re barely on the second season. Just wait.”

“I _would_ if _someone_ hadn’t dragged me outside to sit around doing nothing,” Eli says, huffing.  
“Can I watch netflix on your phone?”

“Ugh _fine_ ,” Louis says, fussing with his iphone and handing it over. A few feet away, a mother bundles her child away from them, glaring. He’s gotten used to people treating him oddly when he’s talking to Eli in public.

“This wouldn’t be an issue if you had just _waited to watch it with me_ ,” Eli grumbles, fingers carefully holding the phone in his monkey hands.

“I already told you,” Louis sighs, “you scare Niall. He saw _Rise of the Planet of the Apes_ and he thinks you’re going to murder him.”

“I just might,” Eli mutters under his breath, before lying back to watch his favorite show. Louis ignores him and closes his eyes behind his sunglasses, dozing a little. It’s not often he gets a day off like this away from the shop. Owning his own business is tiring work, but he loves his job.

“Harry’s just texted,” Eli says, patting Louis’ thigh. “He said someone’s just bought Rita with a million crying emojis.”

Louis sighs. “I keep telling him not to get too attached to the new kittens, they’re going to be gone soon.” Neither of them point out the fact that, more often than not, once someone’s bought a cat or hamster or iguana that Louis favors, Louis has to retreat to the back room, too emotional to watch them leave.

It’s the bad part of both owning a pet shop and being able to speak to animals, he figures. He gets to know them all before they’re sold, and it’s painful to see them go, even if he’s sure they’re going to a good home. And because he knows exactly what they need and how to care for them, Louis thinks that the pain is worth it. He’s worked at too many awful pet shops that treat their animals horribly. It’s why Louis opened the shop in the first place.

“Tell him to fuck off,” Eli says, waving the phone at Louis, and Louis sits up.

“I don’t understand what your problem is with him.” Eli has had this passionate hatred for Harry Styles ever since the boy started working at Louis’ shop. It’s half hilarious and half incredibly distressing for Harry, who is constantly offering Eli treats and such to try and win his favor.

“He’s _annoying_ ,” Eli huffs, before going back to his show. Louis rolls his eyes.

“You think _everything’s_ annoying,” he says, but Eli ignores him. Louis reaches for his coat to get his ipod when he stops. “And what do we have here?” he says to himself.

Across the small field where they’re sitting, Louis spots a tiny white dog sniffing around, dragging a lead behind it. As far as Louis can tell, the dog’s completely alone. He nudges Eli, who looks up and groans.

“ _Fine_ ,” he says, while Louis stands up. He reaches up to grab at Louis’ hand and together they trudge their way across the field. Louis trusts Eli to stay where he is and not run off, but they’ve had too many incidents where people have seen a lone chimpanzee sitting out in public and went into a panic, so when Louis takes Eli places he tends to go where Louis goes, even if it’s just twenty feet away to meet a new friend.

“Hello,” Louis says once they reach the dog, a little bull terrier. “What are you doing?”

The dog looks up, startled. “Hiya,” she says, sitting down in front of Louis. “I’m trying to find my guy.”

“Would you like help?” Louis asks politely, crouching down to the dog’s eye level. “We’ll find him quicker if there’s more of us. I’m Louis, this is Eli.” He gestures to Eli, who gives a wave, opening and closing his little fist.

“I’m Pig,” Pig says happily, standing with her tail wagging. “My guy’s name is Grimmy. He’s tall, with brown hair that goes up.” She flicks her snout up, “Like this."

“Aaaalright,” Louis says, scratching his head and standing up himself. “Where did you last see him?”

Pig immediately starts walking, Louis and Eli ambling behind her. “We were sitting by the pond with his friend Aimee, and I was being a good girl and not going too far but there was this _golden retriever_.” She pauses in her steps, shaking herself from head to tail and groaning. “ _So hot_. I couldn’t let him just _get away_ , so I followed him and his girl, but they were running too fast and I got a bit lost.”

Louis chokes back a laugh, covering his mouth with one hand. Eli scoffs. “That’s so irresponsible,” Eli says, “you could have been picked up by someone and taken to a shelter. Or _worse_.”

Louis rolls his eyes, “Leave her alone, Eli. You can’t stop true love.” Pig looks back at him, tongue hanging out of her mouth and tail wagging furiously.

“You get me!” Pig says, “He was _gorgeous_. His fur was so shiny.”

“A bit big for you, maybe,” Louis says, grinning.

“Hmph, I could take him,” Pig says snootily. “My guy says I’m the prettiest dog around.”

“He’s not wrong,” Louis says, smiling down at her.

“I like you,” Pig says happily, “you’re nice.” She looks back at Eli, narrowing her eyes. “I _don’t_ like you.”

“I’m heartbroken,” Eli drawls sarcastically.

“Be nice,” Louis says. “We’ve got to find Pig her person. Remember when you got lost at Ikea? It was awful, I bet Grimmy is frantic right now.”

Pig sighs. “He _is_ very dramatic. One time I was hiding under his bed and he started crying when he couldn’t find me.”

Louis laughs out loud, and Pig barks along happily. It’s then that they hear someone in the distance yelling Pig’s name, and a very tall, frantic man runs up to them, panting heavily.

“Oh my god,” the man says, crouching down to gather Pig into his arms. “Where have you _been_? I’ve been looking _everywhere_ , Pig dog. Don’t _do_ that.” He looks up, suddenly noticing Louis and Eli.

“Um,” he says, “hello.”

“Hello,” Louis says, waving. “I’m Louis. Me and Eli were just trying to help this one find you,” he gestures to Pig, wiggling happily in Grimmy’s arms.

“Oh,” Grimmy says, standing up with Pig still in his arms. “Um, thank you then? I’ve never met anyone with a pet monkey before. Bit weird,” he says awkwardly, Pig licking the underside of his jaw frantically.

Louis’ mouth twists a little. “Then I guess you haven’t met anyone worth knowing. And Eli doesn’t really like people calling him my pet,” he says, and Nick looks down at Eli, surprised. “He’s his own person.”

“Oh, sorry,” Nick says sheepishly, then looks down at Eli. “Sorry, Eli.”

Eli looks away, slipping his hand into Louis’. Louis shrugs. “It’s okay, thanks. Glad we found you, Pig was worried.”

“ _Pig_ was worried,” Nick huffs. “I doubt it. A menace, this one is.” He scratches behind Pig’s ears and her leg kicks happily.

“Yesssss,” she says happily, wiggling up and nudging Nick’s face with her nose. Louis laughs, and Nick looks fondly down at his dog. At that moment, there’s a loud buzzing from Louis’ pockets, and he pulls his phone out to see that Harry’s calling, probably to complain about selling Rita and demand Louis to bring him treats in consolation. Louis sighs.

“Well, looks like me and Eli have to go,” Louis says. “Nice to meet you two. See you, Pig. Grimmy.” He nods, and then steers himself and Eli around, back in the direction of the shop. Eli turns to glare back at them and Louis nudges him with his hip. “Be nice, Eli.”

Further back, Nick waits until they’re out of sight, staring curiously after them. Pig loses patience with him, writhing until Nick puts her down and grabs tightly to her lead. She drags at it, pulling her little harness, until Nick turns around and follows her back to where they left Aimee and Thurston. “The only thing is, Pig,” Nick says absentmindedly. “I don’t think I told him our names.”

 

***

 

The thing about adopting Pig was that she somehow came pre-spoiled.

She was a shelter dog, so Nick has no clue what her background is or who owned her before he did. All he knows is that she outright refuses most brands of dog food that aren’t ridiculously expensive, won’t walk through puddles, and sometimes stares at him like he’s the biggest idiot she’s ever had the pleasure of knowing.

She’s giving him that look when they end up stranded under an awning in the middle of their evening walk, rain pouring down around them.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he says, glaring back at her. “You’re the one that wanted to leave the house.”

She had been an absolute menace from the minute she woke Nick up -- earlier than is necessary on a _Saturday_ \-- tearing through the house and knocking things over and spilling her food bowl all over the floor. Nick had thought a walk would calm her down slightly so he could have a relaxing evening for once, but he’d somehow managed to forget the one thing Londoners can never go without: a fucking umbrella.

He’s considering just making a run for it, picking Pig up and running in the direction of their flat, but Pig’s ears perk up and before he knows it her lead is slipping from his lax grip and she’s running off into the torrential downpour.

“Pig! No!” Nick yells, running after her down the sidewalk. He’s instantly soaked, hair flopping down into his eyes. He swipes it away to see that Pig’s stopped just at the end of the block, stood up against the legs of someone carrying an umbrella. Nick curses, moving a bit quicker.

“I’m _so_ sorry,” Nick says, sputtering in rain. “She slipped away, I’m sorry.” The person looks up and Nick is surprised to see that it’s the guy from the park. “Oh, hey, Louis, right?”

Louis narrows his eyes suspiciously at Nick. “Does this happen a lot, or something? You need to take better care of your dog,” he says, gesturing towards Pig.

Nick frowns. “I take _very_ good care of her, thank you. She’s spoiled to all hell. You’ve just caught me on one of my off days. Plus, she’s a menace. Look at her.” He points down to where she’s left wet paw prints all over Louis’ skinny jeans. Nick winces, “I’ll pay for them to be cleaned, promise.”

To Nick’s surprise, Louis laughs. “Naw, mate, it’s okay. I’m used to it. Occupational hazard.” He waves to the building they’re standing next to, and Nick looks over to see a large window with the words “TOMMO’S PET SHOP” drawn lovingly across it, along with a few cartoonish drawings of baby animals. There’s a wall full of kennels visible in the shop, and the idea of puppies for Nick to possibly pet has his heart skipping a beat.

“You work here?” he asks, barely stopping himself from pressing his front up against the window and cooing.

“Bloody own the place, don’t I?” Louis says proudly, grinning.

“ _Really?_ ” Nick says. “That’s amazing, mate. As young as you are.” Louis looks over at him, as though trying to see how sincere Nick is. Then he shrugs casually.

“Done alright for myself, I guess,” he says, and then he seems to notice the state Nick’s in, soaked from head to toe. “Shit,” he says, “what am I doing? Just look at you.” He moves the umbrella over Nick, having to reach a little to make up for the height difference. He’s immediately drenched, shaggy hair plastering itself against his face.

“Oh, you don’t have to--” Nick says, automatically moving closer so they can both be protected by the umbrella, tripping a little to avoid stepping on Pig, who nips at his shoelaces in response. Crowded like they are, with Nick hunched so they’re both protected from the rain, he can’t help but focus on how close their faces are. Louis has the nicest blue eyes, bright even in the dim light of the evening, and his lips are _right there_ , twisted like Louis is trying to fight a grin. “Um, hi,” Nick says stupidly, forcing himself to look anywhere but at Louis’ lips and failing.

“Hi again,” Louis says. “So, it just so happens that I own the building we’re standing next to…”

“Right,” Nick says, stepping back a little. He bends down and grabs Pig’s lead, looping the handle around his wrist to prevent further escape. “I’ll uh, just get going then--”

“Don’t be stupid,” Louis says. “You can come in and dry a bit. If the towels in there are good enough for the puppies, they’re good enough for you.” He moves to unlock the door. “I was just closing up when Pig came to say hi, but we can stay a bit, at least until the rain lets up a little.” He opens the door, and when Nick doesn’t immediately follow he rolls his eyes. “I mean, unless you _want_ to walk home in the middle of a bloody monsoon.”

Nick hesitates, but decides to throw caution to the wind and follow Louis inside, Pig trotting happily beside him. “You see, though,” Nick says, doing his best not to drip too severely all over Louis’ floor. “It’s a bit weird that Pig ran off to see you, usually she _hates_ being wet. She won’t even walk in puddles, always forces me to carry her over them.”

Louis snorts. “That’s because Pig is a _lady_ , and that’s the gentlemanly thing to do. Right, Pig?” Pig barks in response and Nick and Louis laugh.

Louis reaches over and flicks on the fluorescent lights, calling “I’m _baaaack_ ” into the shop. There’s instantly a chorus of chirps and squeaks and barks throughout the shop and Louis laughs delightedly. Nick looks around in awe as all the animals sleepily raise their heads and acknowledge Louis’ presence.

“Oh my god,” Nick says, as Louis makes his way behind the counter and into the back room to fetch some towels. There’s a nearby kennel filled with a pile of puppies, all on top of each other with their tags wagging sleepily. “Is that how they always react to you? How do you do that?”

“I guess I’ve just got a way with animals,” Louis says brightly, throwing a towel at Nick’s head. Nick catches it and rubs it over his curls and face. It smells like the dog shampoo that he uses to wash Pig.

When he pulls the towel down away from his face, Louis immediately shakes his head wildly, spraying drops of water everywhere. Pig immediately follows his example. Nick brings his towel up to block his face. “Jesus, Louis, you spend too much time with dogs.”

“Blasphemy,” Louis says, grinning. They both use the towels to dry as much of themselves as they can without actually taking off their wet clothes, and then team up to catch Pig with their towels. Once they’re done and Pig is nice and dry, Louis hops up to sit on the counter, kicking his legs. Rain beats down on the front windows, distorting everything outside. “I guess it’ll be a while before we can leave, huh? It’s pretty bad outside.”

Nick groans, “I can’t believe I forgot a fucking umbrella. Don’t know what I was thinking.”

Louis shrugs, pushing his damp hair out of his eyes. “It happens,” he says. “So, you from around here?”

Nick walks over to lean against the counter next to where Louis’ sitting. “Sort of. Pig likes to take long walks.” He leans back on his elbows, crossing his ankles and biting his lip. Pig sniffs around curiously, taking in all the different smells. It’s a bit awkward, and Nick’s about to say something when Louis jumps off the counter suddenly, moving towards the kennels.

“Hey,” he says, turning so he’s walking backwards. “Want to meet everyone?” He spread his arms out proudly, and there’s a wave of sound from the animals again. His eyes sparkle under the bright lights, and there’s just something a bit odd about him that Nick can’t quite understand. He’s smiling, and his teeth are sort of sharp-looking and really, the boy is stunning.

Nick pushes himself upright, walking over. “Puppies first?” he says, and Louis’ grin widens, already reaching for the kennel with the puppies.

“Puppies first,” he says, pulling a small brown fluffball out and cradling it to his chest. His smile softens when he looks down at the bundle in his hands, and Nick is so, so gone.

 

***

 

Louis doesn’t really know how it all got to this point, but somehow he’s ended up sitting on the floor of his shop after closing with the owner of the bull terrier he helped the other day, a puppy in each arm. He doesn’t really mind, he hates leaving all the animals alone when he closes up. Sometimes he bunches a jumper under his head and sleeps over on the floor of the shop, covered in all sorts of fluffy animals, but it always ends with him horribly achey and sore, so he tries not to let their cute little faces tempt him too often.

Grimmy seems to be in heaven, a puppy in one of his giant hands and three in his lap. They’ve spent the day rolling all over each other in their playpen, so they’re knackered, not doing much when Louis pulled them out of their kennel but going limp and falling asleep wherever Louis set them. Grimmy pets the puppy -- Mango is his name, and Louis should know better than to let Harry name the animals -- gently, cooing and nuzzling in turn. It’s absolutely adorable.

Pig is walking around the shop in circles, attempting to meet all the animals. “Hiya, I’m Pig,” she says to the iguanas. “Hello, nice to meet you, I’m Pig,” she says to the hamsters, and so on until she’s looped around the shop at least ten times.

“This must be the best job on the planet,” Grimmy says, quietly so as to not wake Mango. “I thought I had the best job on the planet, but this is probably a hundred times better.”

“Mango has that effect on everyone,” Louis says knowingly, setting his own puppies -- Sonny and Cher -- down in his lap to curl together. “Where do you work?”

“His name is _Mango_?” Grimmy says, wrinkling his nose. “What kind of name is that? And I work at Radio 1. I do the Breakfast Show,” he says proudly, the sides of his mouth turning up like he can’t help but smile saying it.

“ _Really_ ,” Louis says, “don’t listen to the radio much, mate, but that’s impressive.”

“Thanks,” Grimmy says, lifting Mango up to touch their noses together. “Was like, my dream job since I was ten and all.”

“Even more impressive,” Louis says. Then he reaches over and pokes at all the puppies Nick has. “Mango, Kenneth, Optimus, and Niall Jr. I’ve got Sonny and Cher. So I’m assuming Grimmy is, what? A DJ name?”

“My full name’s Nick Grimshaw,” he says back, grinning. “Grimmy for short.”

Louis wrinkles his nose, “Nick is so much better than Grimmy, though. Grimmy is a bit weird.”

Nick shrugs, “It’s what everyone calls me. You can call me Nick if you want.” Then he frowns, brow furrowed. “Only thing is though, Louis, I don’t really remember telling you --”

“Do you want to meet the hamsters?” Louis says, quickly, scooping up Sonny and Cher and standing up. He’s blushing when he sets them back in their kennel. He’s not usually so careless with the things he talks to the animals about.

“Um, sure,” Nick says, picking up all four of his puppies and setting them delicately back with their brothers and sisters. Louis leads him over to the rodent cages. Most of them have burrowed into their woodchips or have hidden themselves in their various items of hamster furniture, but a few of the usual suspects are out and about.

“Heeeeey, Louis!” Chico says, running frantically on his squeaky wheel. “You’re here late, today!”

“Hiya, Chico,” Louis says to the hamster, bending down to look into his cage. “Don’t you ever give it a rest?”

“No rest for the wicked, brother!” Chico says, still running. “No pain, no gain. Gotta stay fit!” Louis snorts.

“This one is Chico?” Nick asks, bending down to look into Chico’s cage. “Who names these animals?” His face is awfully close to Louis’, basically cheek to cheek, and when Louis peeks over he is momentarily distracted by how long Nick’s eyelashes are.

Louis moves away, shrugging. Names are tricky with animals. They all have names naturally, of course. Pretty much all living things have names, but the names of animals aren’t really things that can be recreated by people like Louis. It’s easier to just give them different names than try and learn their real ones, and most animals don’t really get too fussed over it. “I name them, or one of my mates that work with me. My friend Niall named Chico, I think.”

“Niall! My man!” Chico cheers, still running. He stumbles a little and ends up spinning over and over in the wheel, caught up in the momentum, and Nick giggles.

“Isn’t it a bit dangerous, though? Naming them?” Nick says, standing up. “I wouldn’t be able to let them go.”

“It’s hard sometimes,” Louis concedes, reaching into Chico’s cage to stop the wheel gently. Once Louis removes his hand he goes right back at it, though. “I think it’s better for the animals though, you know? They’re happier if you treat them right.”

“Still, though,” Nick says, but he drops it. He moves to the next cage, where Jerry’s plastered himself up against the side of Carmilla’s cage. “Who’s this, then?”

“ _Carmilla_ ,” Jerry calls, “the night is young! Please come out, let me tell you my deepest secrets and desires.”

“That’s Jerry,” Louis says, rolling his eyes. “Hiya, Jerry.”

“Hello, Louis,” Jerry says woefully, turning towards Louis and away from Carmilla’s cage where, as far as Louis can tell, Carmilla has hidden herself completely in her woodchips. Probably stuffed her ears full of them as well. “Why won’t she give me a chance?” Louis shakes his head, moving back from the cage.

“Jerry’s a good guy, a bit dramatic. He’s got the hots for Carmilla there,” he waves a hand towards Carmilla’s cage. “She won’t give him the time of day though. Not ready for commitment.”

“I have more than _the hots_ for Carmilla,” Jerry says. “I’m _in love_ with her.”

“That’s too bad,” Nick says, looking amused. “He leans forward to press the tip of his finger into Jerry’s cage. “Sorry about that, mate. Unrequited love sucks.”

Jerry moves forward and presses his tiny paws against the tip of Nick’s finger, eyes sparkling. “ _Thank you_ ,” he says sincerely, sniffling a little. “No one understands my plight.”

“ _Whatever_ ,” Louis says, and it’s then that they hear a tiny clang against one of the cages and Louis sighs.

Bart’s trying to escape again, pushing as hard as he can against the front of his cage like it’s going to do anything. Nick looks over and lights up. “Is that a _hedgehog_.”

“Yup, that’s Bart,” Louis says, and they move over to his cage. Bart looks fiercely up at them, fire in his eyes. If he could, he would be shaking his little fist at them.

“It’s _Bartholomeu, cretin_ ,” he hisses. He lets out a series of angry noises and Nick squeals.

“Oh my god, can I hold him?” Nick asks, and Louis hesitates. Bart is definitely the meanest animal they’ve got in stock, which is why he’s been here so long. The only human he’s ever really liked, oddly enough, is Harry.

“Okay,” Louis says, “but be careful. He’s a bit ornery.” He dips his hand into Bart’s cage and scoops him up with a practiced hand. He then lifts Bart up to eye level. “You need to be _nice_ , Bart. How many times do I have to tell you? We don’t need another lawsuit.”

“We need _a million lawsuits_ ,” Bart yells. “So many this awful place is forced to close down and I am free to go where I truly belong, the wild!”

“ _Right_ ,” Louis says sarcastically, before depositing Bart into Nick’s waiting hands. Bart sits in a ball, huffing and glaring up at Nick.

“You are the cutest thing I’ve ever seen,” Nick gushes, and Bart bristles.

“I am not _cute_ ,” he snaps at Nick. “I am _danger_.”

“Oh my god, Louis. He’s so cute,” Nick says, never taking his eyes off of Bart. He shuffles Bart in his cup hands a bit until he’s just settled in one of Nick’s palms and uses his other fingers to rub along the side of Bart’s neck. “If I didn’t already have Pig to take care of I’d buy him in an instant.”

“ _Oh,_ ” Bart says, eyes going a bit glazed as Nick gently rubs his belly. “That’s...I guess this is alright. For now.”

Louis scoffs. “That’s what the last five people who bought him said, right before they returned him after a couple of days. He’s a monster.”

“Be quiet, human,” Bart says, relaxed. “I hate you. This one though, he’s alright. He’s like Harry. Good hands.”

And that has Louis looking at Nick’s hands, which he had objectively noticed were huge before when he managed to carry two puppies each in them, but he hadn’t _noticed_ them.

“Look, over here we’ve got our reptiles,” he says, mouth a bit dry, and Nick follows him as he introduces all the various lizards and snakes, Nick cuddling Bart the entire time.

Nick listens attentively as Louis tells him all the names of the animals and giving him a short introduction. It’s not often that people indulge Louis in this, with the exception of his friends, but he pays them to pay attention to these animals, so it’s not as fun.

Louis gets caught up trying to convince Nick to hold Sally, a boa constrictor named by Louis’ friend Liam, when they’re interrupted by a sharp bark from Pig. They both look over, stunned, where Pig is looking up at them. She barks again.

“I’m hungry,” she tells Louis, indignant. “Tell him I’m hungry.”

Nick frowns down at her, and then gently adjusts Bart in his hands so he can look down at the watch on his wrist. “Holy shit,” Nick says, “It’s already past midnight. You’re hungry, aren’t you, Pig dog?”

Pig barks, tail wagging, and says “Finally!” Louis frowns, suddenly not ready to stop spending time with Nick, but Nick is already walking back to Bart’s cage, petting him once on the head before setting him back in.

Louis follows him around the shop as he picks up his still-damp coat and Pig’s lead, pouting slightly. “What’s wrong?” Pig asks him, looking up at him. “Don’t you like my Grimmy?” Louis smiles down at her, crouching down to pet her on the head, but he doesn’t answer.

“Thanks so much for this,” Nick says, smiling softly down at Louis. “I had a lot of fun.”

Louis gulps, feeling his face heat up. The way Nick’s talking sounds a bit like they’d just been on a date, and Louis doesn’t really know how to feel. “It’s fine, I couldn’t let you and Pig walk home in the rain.”

“Still,” Nick says, and Louis stands up. They grin at each other for a moment, neither of them ready to move just yet.

“Get his phone number!” Pig yells at him, and Louis starts.

“Right,” Louis says to himself, before saying. “Let’s get going then shall we?”

“Yeah,” Nick says, sounding a little disappointed, and they leave the shop, Nick waiting for Louis to turn off all the lights and lock up. They stand outside the shop awkwardly. It’s no longer raining, and everything is glistening in the light from the streetlamps. Louis opens his mouth and closes it, not sure what to say.

“So,” Nick starts, at the same time Louis says “Do--”

They laugh, and Louis smiles down at his shoes as Nick goes on. “So, would you be up to-- to do something with me? Like,” he breaks off, laughing, “like something planned? Not like, being stuck with me and Pig in a shop for hours because of the rain.”

Louis bites his lip, trying to school his face into something less giddy. “Nick Grimshaw, are you asking me on a date?” he asks, grinning cheekily up at Nick.

“I mean,” Nick says nervously, “only if you’re up for it. If not we could, um, just forget this ever happened? And I’ll just, uh, go home and we’ll never speak again.”

Louis laughs, throwing his head back with his eyes scrunching until they’re nearly closed. “I would really like to do that, yeah,” he says after he’s calmed down. “Not many people are willing to listen to me ramble on about hedgehogs.”

“Well, not many people are worth your time then, if I’m honest,” Nick says, turning his nose up. Louis laughs again and reaches his hand out.

“Let me give you my number then,” he says, making grabby hands for Nick’s phone “And you better text me, I don’t do any of that waiting around shit.”

“Yes, sir,” Nick says, handing over his phone and waiting. Once Louis has entered his number ( _“louis from the pet shop”_ with the dog emoji and the monkey covering his mouth emoji) they go their separate ways, Louis turning around and walking in the opposite direction of Nick. It’s quiet on the road they’re on, no one else around, so Louis can hear Nick speaking softly to Pig as they walk away, and Pig answering him, though there’s no way Nick understands.

Louis looks down at his feet again to hide his grin, an extra bounce in his step that hadn’t been there before because he can’t believe he’s managed to find someone who talks to animals almost as much as he does.

 

***

 

The next time Louis sees Nick, he’s running up to him on the sidewalk, out of breath and flustered. Louis had been staring up at the entrance of their first date’s destination with trepidation.

“I’m _so sorry_ I’m late,” Nick says, panting and trying to fix his wilting hair.

“Nope, sorry,” Louis says, grinning up at him. “You’re not forgiven. I only stuck around to tell you that. Have a nice life.”

“Ha ha,” Nick says, sarcastically. “But anyway, is this a great idea, or is it a great idea?” he says, gesturing to the gates of the London Zoo. “I was like, what does Louis like? That’s right, all the animals.”

Louis nods, smile dropping a bit. He can hear the distant rumble of hundreds and hundreds of voices, on top of the noise of the people visiting the zoo. “It’s a good choice,” he says, and Nick beams at him.

“Come on,” Nick says, and, to Louis’ complete surprise, reaches down to grab Louis’ hand and drag him through the gates. “I got our tickets online and I want to see a giraffe as soon as possible.”

“Oh, visiting family, then?” Louis says cheekily, twining their fingers together. Nick throws his head back and laughs, squeezing Louis’ hand.

“Of course, and then we’ll go see your cousins over at the prairie dog enclosure.” Louis snorts and pokes Nick in the belly with his other hand, and they poke and prod at each other all the way through the process of entering the zoo.

Once they’ve made it inside, though, Louis is quickly overwhelmed. It’s actually a relatively calm day, not many people loitering around, but the animals were going completely off the handle.

“ _Tu parle francais_?” a zebra screeched at him while Nick marveled over the giraffes. “ _Francais?_ French?” Louis sent him a pleading look, hopefully conveying “No, I fucking don’t will you stop yelling at me?”

“Shut up, Jean!” one of the other zebras yelled. “You’re not even fucking French.”

“You know what, _fermez la bouche_ , dickhead,” Jean yelled back, and then on top of everything Louis had a screaming match between two zebras to deal with. All of the giraffes were gossiping with each other, about the people who worked at the zoo and about frequent guests and how they’re liking their new feeding schedule. Nick was taking five million pictures, awkwardly maneuvering his phone in his one free hand.

They hadn’t let go of each others’ hands since they got there, and it was a bit odd for a first date, but really, it’s their second date anyway. He appreciated the extra bit of comfort though, as there was already a pounding building up behind his eyes.

Nick made a disgusted noise, “That one over there just licked up his own nose,” he says when Louis gives him a questioning look, so Louis looks over to see the aforementioned giraffe, who’s a girl as it seems and is discussing...Oh, well. That’s actually. That’s actually quite racist.

“Have you had enough quality time with your distant relatives, then?” Louis says, turning back to Nick. “Anything else you’re dying to see?” Hopefully he wants to see a quiet animal, like a sloth, or an anteater.

“Well, I wanted to see the birds of paradise,” Nick says, and Louis’ heart sinks. “I reckon if I were an animal, I’d be a bird of paradise,” Nick says, running a hand through his hair and smiling winningly. Louis laughs, even though he’s already dreading going to see the birds.

At one time, Louis had a bird. He wanted something that other people would be able to understand for once, and also the ability to teach an animal to say things like “shit cock fuckhead” because that’s hilarious. The thing is, when Louis said that animals never shut the fuck up, he meant that doubly so for birds. Birds are the bane of his existence, he has nightmares about the time when his bird (Bruce Wayne) would stay up all night, calling his name loudly to try to get his attention in animal speak while also yelling “Fuck you!” in human speak. Louis has gotten used to the rumble of animals in his shop, listening to them for hours at a time, but that's only because Louis has a strict No Birds policy.

By the time they reach the birds of paradise enclosure, the dull thump in his head has upgraded to a persistent banging. Birds are never _quiet_ , is the thing. They don’t _discuss_. They’re yelling _all the time_ , even in their own native language.

Nick says something, once they’re in the middle of all the birds, and Louis has been actively forcing himself not to cover his ears with his hands, so he doesn’t catch it. “What?” he yells, startling Nick. Louis assumes that, for normal people, it is nowhere near loud enough to have to yell the way Louis is, but Louis can’t hear for shit over the flock of cockatoos singing _West Side Story_ to his left.

“I feel pretty and witty and _gaaaaaaaaaaay_ ,” one of them yells, horrendously off key, and Louis winces.

“Are you okay?” Nick says, or at least that’s what Louis thinks he says, only able to read his lips. Louis nods, biting his lip nervously, but Nick still looks worried. “I’m fine!” he says loudly, and it sounds like a lie even to his own aching ears. His palm is getting sweaty to the point of uncomfortable in Nick’s hand, and he gets embarrassed, pulling it away quickly. He crosses his arms and tucks his hands against his side. “Really,” he says, just as loudly.

“Come on,” Nick mouths, and he leads Louis out of the building gently, hand at the small of his back. Just next to the Birds of Paradise building is the penguin enclosure, with benches all around their little pool. Nick sits them down at one of the benches, gently grasping at Louis’ cheeks and looking him in the eyes. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

“I’m fine,” Louis says weakly, trying to smile and failing. His head is killing him. “Was a bit loud in there, is all.”

Nick frowns. “Do you need anything?” he asks, and then he seems to make the decision for Louis. “I’m going to get you some water, okay? The cafe’s just over there.” He points over somewhere behind Louis, and Louis nods.

“Actually, yeah, that would be nice,” he says. “Head hurts a bit.” And Nick nods, getting up and squeezing Louis’ shoulder.

“I’ll be right back,” he says, and then he’s off. Louis rubs his temples with his fingers, and he’s never before in his life resented his power. Not even when he was sixteen and losing his virginity to a play by play commentary by a pair of pigeons outside his window. But he really likes Nick. They’ve been texting back and forth constantly since the night at the shop, and he’s _funny_. It’s rare that Louis meets someone who can match him in silly jokes and snide comments.

“Hey,” comes a voice from behind him, and he turns around to see a crowd of penguins waddling up to him. He smiles weakly at them.

“Hi,” he says, “I’m Louis.” There’s a chorus of names in response and Louis closes his eyes as all the noise shoots straight through his head.

“Are you okay?” one of the smaller ones says, and Louis nods.

“Yeah, it’s just a bit much. You all want to talk to me,” he says, laughing. The penguins nod understandingly at him.

“Are you on a date with the tall man?” the same small penguin says, and Louis blushes. “Are we ruining it?”

“It’s okay,” Louis says. “It’s not your fault. You lot are actually pretty quiet. At least compared to,” he nods back at the Birds of Paradise building, where he can still hear a loud chorus of birds yelling at each other.

“They’re always like that,” another penguin says. “Bloody annoying.” Louis snorts and they all giggle at him.

“Stay here by us,” the small penguin says. “We’ll be quiet so you can talk to your boy.”

“Thank you,” Louis says, touched, and they all wave their arms a bit at him and dart off, sliding on their bellies down to the water. It’s then that Nick comes back, a tray in his hands covered in water bottles and a plate of chips.

“Aww, did I miss them?” he says sadly, nodding his head at the penguins.

Louis shrugs. “They’re around,” he says as Nick sits down next to him, setting the tray in his lap.

“I figured you would want something to eat as well,” Nick says. “To feel better.”

“Thanks, mate,” Louis says, snatching up a chip and shoving it in his mouth.

“It’s funny,” Nick continues, opening one of the water bottle and offering it to Louis. “It looked like you were have a proper conversation with the penguins. I took a picture,” he looks sheepish at Louis’ raised eyebrow. “It’s shit. All blurry because I had to zoom in from so far.”

“That’s a bit creepy,” Louis says, and laughs when Nick blushes. “Naw, mate, it’s fine. I should have taken a picture when they were all up close. Didn’t even think.”

“It’s okay,” Nick says. “All my mates give me so much shit for how I talk to Pig all the time like she’s a person, but you do the same thing.” Louis smiles at him, because their situations aren’t actually very similar at all.

“Animals like it when you treat them equally,” he says, taking another chip. Nick nods and asks after the shop, and they get caught up in a conversation about how Eli’s doing (still a moody shit. On the final season of _Breaking Bad._ ) and the weird people that come into the shop sometimes (“One time, I swear Nick, Cruella Deville walked in. No, she didn’t _look_ like Cruella, but she had ulterior motives. I didn’t like the way she looked at my kittens.”). Nick tells him about his job at the radio, obviously trying to impress Louis by dropping celebrity names and such, but Louis finds that he just likes the way Nick looks when he talks about his job, lit up from the inside because he’s doing what he loves.

Once they’re finished with their food, Nick in the middle of a story about calling his friend Collette on air to try and prank her for the hundredth time, Louis finds that his headache is nearly gone, and he’s secretly very thankful to the penguins for helping him out. Nick gets up to go and throw away their trash, stopping Louis when he tries to do it, and Louis turns around calling for the penguins under his breath.

The same small one swims up. “Did it work?” she asks, and Louis grins, nodding.

“Thank you so much,” he says, and the penguin nods.

“We told one of the pigeons about you and she said she would go around and tell everyone to try and be quieter when they see you two,” she says, and Louis is reminded once again of the reason he loves animals so much. They’re the nicest people he knows.

He thanks her again, then grins shyly and asks for another favor, which she immediately agrees to, and by the time Nick’s back, there’s a whole crowd of penguins up by the gates, looking up at Louis and flapping their flippers happily. Nick has a bit of a moment, covering his mouth with his fist, eyes shining as he bends forward and coos at all of them. He takes out his phone and takes a million more pictures, before pulling Louis to him and lifting the phone up over their heads, penguins posing in the background.

“This is incredible,” Nick says. “We need to document this.” Louis laughs and lets himself fall into Nick’s side, smiling up at the camera as Nick slides his other arm around Louis’ shoulders. They leave a bit later, both Nick and Louis waving back to the penguins as they walk away, Louis mouthing thank you.

After that, everything is smooth sailing. News travels fast in the zoo, apparently, as there is no more yelling, and the animals even tend to be more attentive than they would usually be, walking up to them and nudging at their hands through the gates. They talk about everything and nothing as they walk around. Louis’ hand eventually finds Nick’s again somewhere along the way. Nick is completely charmed by every animal they come across, and Louis is completely charmed by Nick.

They walk through the zoo until they’ve tired themselves out -- even going to see the penguins again. Louis almost doesn’t want it to end, but he’d left Eli at Liam’s and he still needed to do the closing shift at the shop, and Nick had made plans for dinner with his friend Daisy. So they hover for a bit just outside the zoo’s entrance, neither really willing to leave.

“I had fun,” Louis says, shifting back and forth on his feet. “Sorry I got a bit...you know.”

“It’s fine, I had a great time as well,” Nick says, smiling down at his feet, and god, Louis _really_ likes him. “So, uh,” Nick says, “I guess we better get going.”

“Right,” Louis says, “places to be, and all that.” Their hands are still tangled together, and Louis squeezes once before letting go. “One more thing, though,” he says, biting his lip, and Nick looks up curiously, just in time for Louis to step up onto his tiptoes, hands reaching up to Nick’s shoulders and pressing down lightly. Nick takes the hint and hunches down, meeting Louis’ lips halfway.

It’s a soft kiss at first, a little hesitant, but Louis presses up further, kissing Nick firmly. Nick sets his hands on Louis’ waist, bending further down so Louis doesn’t have to reach so far, and it’s like the day they just had, it’s nice, and he’s already looking forward to doing it again, and again.

They separate after a short while, blushing and laughing a little as they realize that there are people all around them the entire time. Nick’s phone chimes in his back pocket, an obnoxious pop song that makes Louis smile, and they say their goodbyes. Louis lifts up on his toes again to kiss Nick on the cheek. Nick heads off first, smiling back at Louis every so often with his phone pressed to his ear. Louis waits for him to turn the corner, out of sight, before he goes, one hand in his pocket and one pressed lightly to his smiling lips.

 

***

 

Almost a month into dating Louis, and it’s great, but Nick can’t help but feel that there’s something...off.

Honestly, Louis’ basically everything Nick wants wrapped up in a tiny, gorgeous boy. He’s funny and nice, and he rarely puts up with Nick’s shit. He’s never afraid to disagree with Nick and voice his opinion, or take him down a peg when Nick’s had a shitty day and is sulky and rude in response. In return, Nick’s learning just how to deal with Louis on a bad day, how to tuck him under one arm and lay them down for a nap so Louis doesn’t tear through everyone he comes across.

Louis’ prickly, and he’s pretty and he’s _fucking hilarious_. He can be rude, but just rude enough that Nick likes having him around, even when he’s being rude to Nick. He’s _northern_ , and he’s got a great big family like Nick’s, and it’s a bit soon to be thinking of things like meeting families, but Nick can’t help it. Nick’s pretty sure his mum would approve of Louis.

Louis’ just great overall, and it’s a shame about his weird animal thing.

It’s good that Louis loves animals. Great, even, because Nick also loves animals, and Louis’ place of work gives Nick an opportunity to visit him and look at kittens on a regular basis. Pig absolutely loves Louis. Pig generally loves everyone, but she loves Louis a _ridiculous_ amount. Sure, now Nick has to deal with Eli, who he’s pretty sure hates him, but it’s a small sacrifice. Most of the time Eli does his own thing anyway.

So yeah, Louis’ great, and his animals are great, but Nick can’t help but notice that there’s something weird about how animals treat Louis.

Everywhere they go, it seems that animals flock to Louis. Once they had gone on a walk together at the park where they had first met, and Nick had left for a moment to chase after Pig whose lead had, once again, slipped from his grasp, and when him and Pig returned, it was to find Louis sitting on a bench, completely surrounded by squirrels.

“Um,” he’d said, looking up at Nick, a squirrel perched on both shoulders, “I can explain.” Then he stood up, brushing the rodents off his shoulders and walking to Nick as the crowd of squirrels parted like the Red Sea. They weren’t frightened, the way squirrels normally react when humans make sudden movements, they were just there. Louis didn’t offer any explanation.

“Come on,” he said, grabbing Nick’s arm and walking them quickly away from the squirrels. Nick made a disgusted noise.

“Eugh,” he said, “you were just covered in _rats_.” He attempted to wriggle away from Louis, but Louis had wrapped his arm around Nick’s in a vice grip.

“Half an hour ago we both watched Pig roll around in filth,” Louis said, rubbing his side up against Nick. He’s a monster. “What’s the difference?”

“Pig is a princess,” Nick protested, trying and failing to get away from Louis. “ _You’re_ probably covered in _disease_.” They kept pushing and prodding each other back and forth on the sidewalk, until Nick tripped over Pig’s lead and they both went down, Pig barking at them angrily.

“Tell you what,” Louis said, out of breath from laughter. “Take me back to yours and we can have a shower together.” And after that, Nick wasn’t so worried about the fact that Louis was covered in germs.

Not only does Louis draw animals to him, it also seems like Louis makes animals go _crazy_. Every time they encounter a new animal, be it a bird on the street or a squirrel in the park, or even Nick’s friend Aimee’s dog Thurston, as soon as they see Louis they start chirping or barking or squeaking until Louis crouches down to pet them and speak softly to them. Nick has never before in Thurston’s considerable lifetime seen the dog so excited. Louis had to sit down on the floor with Thurston in his lap for the longest time before the dog calmed down.

Whenever Nick’s tried to bring it up to Louis, Louis always shrugs it off. “I’ve got a way with animals,” he says, and changes the subject. It’s the weirdest situation Nick’s ever been in.

At the moment, they’re having a night in at Nick’s flat, watching a movie. Well, Louis’ watching a movie, curled up against Nick’s side while Nick messes about on his laptop, completely disinterested. Louis’ brought Eli over, and he’s done nothing but sit in the corner of Nick’s living room and mess about on his ipad, which is completely baffling to Nick. Not just the fact that a chimpanzee had his own ipad, but also how well Eli used and took care of it. He knew monkeys were smart, but Nick had peeked at Eli’s ipad once when Louis had left to put him to bed and saw that, not only was Eli an avid _Candy Crush_ player, but he was also on level 350 of the game.

Eli intimidated Nick, so he’s fine to let the chimp be and just enjoy his night with Louis, only it seems it’s Nick’s own pet that’s causing a fuss.

Until Louis had come over for dinner, she’d been a perfect angel, not doing much but lying around in the sun and cuddling with Nick. Once Louis had gotten there though, she turned into an absolute monster, knocking Nick’s garbage everywhere and chewing on his expensive shoes. Nick had managed to calm her down a bit, but it’s obvious that she has been working herself in a frenzy. She keeps winding herself up and springs, unbidden, to run around the room excitedly.

Her little claws scratching along the floor make quite a bit of noise, and she manages to run into something every two seconds. “Pig, no,” Nick says sternly, looking up from his laptop screen. “ _Pig_.”

She ignores him, continuing her rampage. She runs over to Eli and jumps into his lap, dislodging the ipad from his hands and causing Eli to make a loud, angry noise. She doesn’t stay there long, though, bounding off and running around the room in circles again. She disappears from sight, and Nick hears a loud crash from his dining room and drops his head back with a groan.

Louis, who's been leaning on Nick's chest and valiantly attempting to focus on the movie, sighs and reaches for the remote. He pauses the movie and stands up, walking out of the room. Nick looks over at Eli and they share a puzzled look. Nick stands up, moving towards his kitchen where he can hear Louis’ voice.

“For god’s sake, Pig dog, you really never give it a rest, do you?” he hears Louis saying and the sound of the refrigerator door opening. “It’s been _hours_ and you’re still acting like this.” He pauses, rummaging through the refrigerator. “Oh _poor you_ , having to eat dog food all the time. News flash, love. You’re a dog.” He pauses again. “No, I’m not going to _warm it up for you_ , I can’t believe I’m doing this in the first place.” Another pause. “No, you know what? I’m doing it because I can tell you’re driving Nick up the wall. You really should treat him better, he does a lot for you.” He hears the microwave door open and close, and Nick decides that’s when he should make his entrance.

“Everything okay in here?” Nick says, brow furrowed. Louis and Pig seem to be in some sort of stand-off, Louis glaring down and Pig glaring up, the beef with broccoli Louis had brought Nick earlier when he’d arrived with takeaway spinning slowly in the microwave.

“Yup!” Louis says brightly, opening the microwave and pulling the styrofoam container out. He grabs a fork from Nick’s silverware drawer and walks over to Pig’s brightly colored food bow, chucking a few pieces of meat in it, and Pig trots over happily and digs in. “Your dog is just a bit spoiled, is all.”

“Right,” Nick says skeptically. “Can we get back to the movie now?” Louis grins at him and walks over, food in hand.

“‘Course, love,” he says, standing on his tiptoes to kiss Nick quickly on the lips before walking past him and back to the living room, munching happily on the food as he goes. Nick looks down at Pig, licking her bowl clean, and scratches at his head.

After that, Pig is a perfect angel again, not even objecting when Nick has to take her out into the rain to use the bathroom before bed. Louis stays over, wears Nick’s way too long pajama bottoms and takes up way too much space in Nick’s bed. He can’t stop thinking about Louis and Pig in the kitchen, and how Louis had known exactly what was wrong with his dog.

 _Louis is great, yeah_ , Nick thinks, pulling him closer to him, eyes drooping. _More than a bit odd, though._

 

***

 

“So are you going to tell him about your thing?” both Eli and Liam say at the same time, one night when Louis and Eli are at Liam’s house for their monthly movie night. Of course, Liam doesn’t know he’s said it at the same time as Eli. Sometimes Liam and Eli are very similar. It never fails to make Louis laugh.

“Tell who what?” Louis says, mouth full of pizza. He’s been sulking all night because he lost the paper-rock-scissors match that would determine whether they spend all night watching Marvel or DC movies.

“Nick,” Liam says cheekily, lifting one socked foot from Louis’ lap and nudging Louis’ thigh. “Your _booooyfriend_.”

Louis blushes and laughs, roughly shoving Liam’s legs off his lap. “Whatever. Shut up. What about him?”

Nearly four months of Louis dating Nick, and Liam had, of course, met him several times. According to Liam, it was part of his duty as “Best Friend For Ever Yes Including The Fucking Monkey Louis” to meet Nick and see whether he was “worthy” of Louis. Louis had enjoyed hyping up the meeting to Nick until Nick was a nervous wreck, thinking Liam was some giant muscle man with anger problems and a tendency to beat up boys who were mean to Louis. In reality, Liam had just smiled ridiculously at Nick upon meeting him and laughed too hard at everything Nick said.

Not to mention the fact that Nick was always making up some stupid reason to drop by the shop. Pig needed _another_ bedazzled collar, or the newest brand of dog food Louis had just got a shipment of, or just that Pig needed interaction with other animals in order to be a better, more well-rounded dog.

“You know,” Harry had said once, when Louis was ringing up Pig’s third collar in as many weeks, “you could just say you want to visit Louis. We’ll understand.”

Nick gasped, affronted. “I have no clue what you’re talking about, young Harold Styles. I obviously come here to see Bart.” Bart, who had wiggled his way up Nick’s chest and into the hood of his hoodie, sleepily chirped an angry “It’s _Bartholomeu_.” before presumedly falling asleep again.

“Honestly though,” Niall had piped then from the back room, because all of Louis’ friends tended to hang around his shop even when he wasn’t paying them to, “you could just come hang out. God knows Lou never shuts up about you when you’re not around.” Louis had blushed then, shoving the bag with the collar at Nick and demanding he put the hedgehog away and never come back. Nick hadn’t let it go for _weeks_.

“So are you going to tell him about your power, or what?” Liam says, swinging his legs back up so he can poke at Louis some more. Liam’s always insisted on calling it his “power,” like Louis’ Spider-man or something. Louis kind of loves it.

Louis frowns at him. “Why would I do that?” he says defensively. He can feel Eli’s eyes on him from across the room.

Liam sighs. “Look, I know telling other people has never gone well before--”

“ _That’s_ an understatement,” Louis mutters under his breath.

“But I think Grimmy’s a good guy! Maybe this time will be different!” Louis looks away from him, wringing his hands. Louis’ a boy who isn’t much afraid of commitment. He prefers long-term relationships to dating around, but his last relationship hadn’t exactly gone as planned.

Eleanor was wonderful, everything he wanted in a girlfriend, and he’d fancied himself proper in love with her. They’d been dating for nearly a year when Louis had gathered up the courage to tell her about his skill. Until Eleanor, the only people who had known about Louis’ ability to speak to animals were his mum and Liam. She hadn’t believed him, no matter how many times he tried to prove it to her. She kept insisting that he get help, that he talk to a professional, and eventually it was too much for him to deal with. He broke things off with her, tired of trying to show her and not willing to lie about his ability anymore. It was awful.

“I’ve barely been dating the guy a few months, why would I want to scare him off so soon?” Louis says weakly, pausing the movie.

“I just think,” Liam says carefully, sitting up and placing himself next to Louis. Louis rests his head on Liam’s shoulder. “I just think that maybe you shouldn’t wait so long this time? It’s only,” he bites his lip, “it’s only you were so sad the last time, Lou. I don’t want to see you go through that again.”

Louis sighs, turning his head to hide his face in Liam’s shoulder. “I don’t know,” he says after a moment. “I don’t think I’m ready for that yet, Li.” He feels Liam nod, hears him say “it’s okay, Lou” and wrap an arm around Louis’ shoulder before starting the movie again and dropping the subject.

Later that night, when they’re walking home, Eli isn’t so forgiving.

“You should tell him,” Eli says out of the blue. Louis is carrying him piggyback and he falters in his step.

“I thought we already talked about this,” Louis says, starting to walk again.

“No, you and _Liam_ talked about it. I think you should tell him.”

“I’m not ready.”

“Well, when will you be ready, then?” Eli says. “ A month from now? Two? A year? Are you just going to never tell him? How long are you planning to lie?”

“You don’t even know that I’ll be dating him that long,” Louis says, but it’s weak.

“You _like_ him,” Eli says, almost accusingly, “and you’re already hiding one of the most important parts of your life from him.”

“Look, Eli, just drop it,” Louis snaps, kicking a rock off the sidewalk. “You’re a fucking monkey.”

“Fine,” Eli snaps back, “but I’m tired of you ignoring me every time he’s around. I was here first.”

Louis doesn’t say anything in response, just stomps up to his flat and leaves Eli to his own devices. It’s just Louis’ luck that he managed to find the most brutally honest chimpanzee to ever exist. He grumbles his way through his nightly routine when he sees his phone light up with a notification. It’s a text from Nick, a cheery goodnight with a million emojis, and Louis drops heavily onto his bed, staring at it.

It’s not fair, because he _does_ really like Nick. He’s tall and clumsy and ridiculous. He’s the perfect size for Louis to tuck under his arm and cuddle up to his side when it gets cold. He’s got the best dog in the world. Louis has a gift, and he’ll never take it for granted, but it complicates things.

He keeps thinking of Liam saying he should tell Nick sooner rather than later to spare himself the heartbreak, and he thinks of Eli asking him how long he plans to lie, and he knows what he has to do.

He reaches over to his bedside table and switches off the lamp and drops his phone down onto the table. Nick’s text goes unanswered. He flops down on the bed then and curls up, facing the wall.

 

***

 

Nick thinks this must be what shock feels like.

“I, uh,” he says, ears ringing like Louis’ just dropped a bomb in front of him (and in a way, he has), “was it anything I did?”

Louis looks miserably down at his plate of pasta. Nick had been surprised when Louis told him that he wanted to take him to dinner. They had gone on plenty of dates, but nothing overly romantic, neither of them were really into that sort of thing. Now Nick sort of understands why Louis wanted to do something different.

“No, ‘course not,” Louis says, avoiding Nick’s eyes at all costs. “I’m just like, not really looking for a serious relationship right now.”

“And you couldn’t have told me that four months ago?” Nick says, voice cracking. Louis winces.

“No, it’s just like,” he sighs, running his hands through his hair. “Yeah.”

“Right,” Nick says, a bit dazed. He looks down at his mostly-full plate. “I’m not really. I’m not really hungry, anymore. I’m just going to.” Louis nods, swallowing, and Nick stands up, grabbing his coat and scarf and walking quickly out the restaurant’s entrance without bothering to put them on. The cold air hits him all at once, freezing his lungs. He shrugs on his warm clothes. As he walks he feels his eyes sting with tears and tells himself it’s the wind, hugging himself and moving as quickly as he can in the direction of his car.

Pig runs up to him as he opens the door to his flat, jumping up at his legs, and it's the sight of her that breaks the barrier on his emotions. Tears start spilling down his cheeks and he sits in his hallway, still in his coat and scarf, and hugs his dog.

“Sorry, Pig dog,” he says, letting her lick frantically up the side of his face for once, “I know you liked him. I did too.”

He sits there with Pig until his legs cramp and his tailbone aches from sitting on the hardwood floor. He stands up then, scooping Pig up in his arms and walking them both to his bedroom. He dumps her onto the bed and quickly sheds his clothes and crawls in after her. She comes up to lay right next to his head on the pillow, just like she always does whenever he lets her sleep in bed with him, only this time he doesn’t scold her and try to make her move towards his feet. Instead he turns his head and buries his face into her side, shoulders shaking as he tries to hide the hitch in his breath. Tomorrow, he’ll call Collette or Gillian or someone to come over and drink shitty wine and badmouth ex-boyfriends, but for tonight he’s got his Pig dog, and he tells himself he’s fine.

 

***

 

“Ow, Jesus!” Louis yells, pulling his hand out from Bart’s cage. “I’ve got to fucking feed you, Bart. That’s not optional.”

“I don’t want any of your nasty food,” Bart snaps, turning away from Louis and digging into his woodchips. “Go away.”

“For fuck’s sake, Bart,” Louis snaps back, “would it kill you to be a bit nicer every once in a while? Maybe then someone will fucking want you.” Bart pauses sharply in his digging before starting again, more harshly than before. Louis feels awful. “Shit, Bart, I’m sorry,” he says, “of course someone wants you.”

“Go away,” Bart mutters, still facing away from Louis.

“Is this because I told you Nick won’t be coming back?” Louis says carefully. It was a complete surprise, a few weeks after Louis broke things off with Nick, that Bart called Louis over and tentatively asked where Nick was.

Louis had been so shocked, and that, coupled with the pang of sadness he still felt at any mention of Nick, he hadn’t been that tactful in telling Bart that, no, Nick wouldn’t be coming back. At least not anytime soon.

“ _Go away_ ,” Bart snaps, before sticking his face in the hole he’djust made.

“Fine,” Louis sighs, turning away. Harry’s giving him big, sad eyes from behind the cash register, so he ignores him, going to check on the reptiles. His friends all think he’s made an awful mistake, dumping Nick, but Louis’ decided that the best course of action is to pretend Nick never happened and aggressively move on with his life.

“Hey, Lou?” Liam calls from the back room. “Zayn’s on the phone for you.”

Louis groans. He’d met Zayn a few days after things ended with Nick, when Louis’d been sadly standing in the middle of the London Zoo, surrounded by penguins and trying to ignore the fact that he felt awful all the time. It turns out that Zayn is one of the zoologists at the zoo, and he thought the way the animals reacted to Louis’ presence was _absolutely fascinating_. He’s been trying to offer Louis a job ever since.

“Tell him I’ve been eaten by a giant snake,” Louis says. “Or that I’ve gone to the Americas.”

“He’s busy,” Louis hears Liam say, and rolls his eyes. From outside there’s an extremely loud clap of thunder, and rain starts pouring down in buckets. All the animals panic, squirming and howling. Louis walks around soothing them, until there’s another clap of thunder and they’re set off again. Louis sighs, and turns to Harry.

“I reckon we can close early today,” Louis says. “No one’s going to go out in that.” Harry nods, and they start to gather up their things.

Usually Louis would feel bad leaving the animals alone, especially with the thunderstorm, but he’s so _tired_. He just wants to get home to Eli and watch _Ozymandias_ for the five hundredth time, but as soon as he’s finished locking up, waving goodbye to Liam and Harry as they move quickly to the nearest tube station, his phone starts vibrating in his pocket.

He doesn’t look at the number before answering, still fiddling with the shop’s lock. “Zayn, I _told_ you--”

“Louis?” Nick says on the other line, high pitched and the tiniest bit frantic. Louis freezes.

“Nick?” he says disbelievingly, and Nick sighs in relief.

“Oh, thank god. Louis, I know we--okay, but I need your help.”

“What’s wrong?” Louis asks quickly.

“It’s,” Nick’s breath hitches, “it’s Pig. We were on our walk and she slipped out of my grasp again, only this time there’s a thunderstorm, and she gets scared, and I can’t find her and--”

“I’ll be right there,” Louis says, pulling his hood up and moving quickly in the direction of Nick’s flat.

“ _Thank you_ ,” Nick says. “I’m so worried and, and you’ve always had this way with animals. I just didn’t know who to--”

“Don’t worry, Nick. I’m already on my way. Where were you when she ran off?” Nick tells him where they were, which is actually pretty close to Louis’ shop, and Louis tells him he’ll start looking and hangs up. He’s not worried about Pig being hit by a car. He’d sat her down once, back when he and Nick were still dating and Louis had realized Pig escaping on walks was a _thing_ , and told her the importance of staying off the road, but considering the weather Louis figured that they should find her as soon as possible.

He turned his hood up over his head, searching any place that looks like it might fit a scared puppy. He would ask a pigeon or something, but everyone is hidden because of the weather so he’s on his own this time. Or at least he thinks he is, until he comes across a mangy cat sitting in an alleyway, perfectly content and dry in a crate.

“Hello,” he says, crouching down. “I’m Louis. Have you seen a white dog anywhere around here?”

The cat eyes him wearily. “Depends who’s asking.”

Louis rolls his eyes. “ _I’m_ asking. I just want to know if you’ve seen her.”

The cat starts grooming herself, considering. “Small dog? White? Big black spots?”

“Yes!” Louis yells, smiling. “That’s her. Have you see her?”

“I don’t know,” the cat says, glaring at him. “Depends on what you’re willing to pay for that information.”

Louis groans. _Cats_. “What do you want?” he asks finally, and the cat looks pointedly over at a nearby convenience store. Louis groans again before standing up and walking over to it.

“ _Now_ will you tell me where she is?” Louis asks, once he’s sat an open container of _Fancy Feast_ in front of her and she’s enthusiastically started eating it.

The cat flicks her tail, annoyed, and lifts her head up to say “Back there, under the dumpster.” before going back to her food. Louis immediately stands up and runs back, dropping to his knees in front of the dumpster and peering under it. Sure enough, there’s Pig, cowering as far back as she can go.

“ _Pig dog_ ,” Louis says, relieved. “What are you doing all the way out here?” He reaches under the dumpster, trying to touch her.

“It’s, uh,” Pig says, voice shaking. “It’s loud.” It’s just then that there’s another clap of thunder, and Pig yelps, curling in on herself.

“No, no!” Louis says, voice soft. “It’s okay! Just come out and I’ll take you back to your person, okay? Just like when we first met.”

“But you _left_ ,” Pig says, tail tucked between her legs. “The first time you came back. You didn’t come back this time.”

Louis feels a lump rise in his throat. “I know, love,” he says. “I know, but your Grimmy misses you, and he’s worried sick, so won’t you let me take you back to him?”

“Will you stay again?” Pig asks, and she’s visibly shaking now, from the cold and from the fear. “If I go with you, will you stay?” Louis closes his eyes for a moment, pained.

“I’ll tell you what,” Louis says. “I’ll stay with you until the storm’s over, will that be okay?”

Pig doesn’t answer, but there’s another clap of thunder, and a bolt of lightning lights up the sky, and she’s scurrying out and into Louis’ arms. He tucks her under his jacket, covering himself in whatever grime she’d been covered in from the dumpster. Then they make their way back to Nick’s, Louis singing softly under his breath to calm her down, trying to block out the sound of the rain.

As soon as they’re in view of Nick’s flat, Nick’s running out. His hair is a mess, wet and flopping in his red-rimmed eyes. Pig immediately throws herself into his arms, and Nick pulls her close, rubbing his face in her grimy fur. They’re soaked, all three of them, and after a moment Nick looks up at Louis.

“Come inside?” he asks carefully. Louis nods, and they walk in together, dripping water everywhere. After a minute of hovering awkwardly in the front hall, Nick laughs, still clutching onto Pig. “We _have_ to stop meeting this way,” he says, nodding at their soaked clothing, and Louis chuckles.

It’s then that Nick seems to realize the state that Pig is in, covered in mud and who knows what, and wrinkles his nose. “Oh my _god_ , Pig, what did you do?” he asks, before turning on his heel and marching towards the bathroom.

Louis stands frozen in the hallway, not sure what to do, but Pig looks up over Nick’s shoulder at him and says “You promised.” So Louis throws caution to the wind and follows them. By the time he gets there, Nick’s already started up a bath for Pig, trying to wriggle her into the bathtub.

“No,” he says, “you don’t get to be stubborn about having a bath this time. You scared me half to death! You’re lucky I’m even giving you a bath, I should let you stay covered in mud for all eternity.”

Louis leans in the doorway, grinning softly at the scene before him. He’s missed them both _so much_. Nick turns and looks at Louis then, his eyes guarded, at Louis in the doorway.

“If you want to dry off, you know where the towels are,” he says, and Louis straightens. “You could borrow some clothes as well, since Pig’s mucked up yours.”

“Cheers,” Louis says quietly, before leaving to dry himself off. He’s changed out of his wet clothes and into a pair of Nick’s trackpants and a t-shirt that is way too big on him, when he hears claws scratching against the floor. He turns around to see Pig standing in the doorway of Nick’s bedroom, completely covered in soap.

“Pig!” he hears Nick yell, “Get back here, you’re getting water everywhere!” She ignores him though, in favor of glaring at Louis.

“You _said_ you wouldn’t leave,” she says, paws spread apart and teeth bared.

“I just went to another room,” Louis says, toweling his hair.

“ _Still_ ,” she says, and it’s then that Nick catches up to her, sweeping her up in his arms. He’s taken off his wet clothes and is standing there in just his underwear. Louis averts his eyes. It’s nothing he hasn’t seen before, but seeing Nick now, soft and floppy and _not his_ is too much to take.

“Honestly, dog, I don’t know what I’m going to do with you,” Nick says, and then he looks up at Louis. “So, are you off then?” he says, and Louis frowns.

“Um,” he says, and he can’t think of any reason for him to stay. “I can’t leave.”

Nick gives him a disbelieving look. “And why is that?” he asks, pulling Pig up to his chest. Pig looks at Louis accusingly, and Louis gulps.

“I just can’t,” he says stupidly, and Nick glares.

“Look, Louis, I’m really glad for your help and all. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t have found her, honestly,” Nick says. “But I don’t. I don’t think I’m ready to see you quite yet, seeing as the last time I saw you you broke my heart for no good reason.”

Louis clenches his fist, the words _broke my heart_ repeating over and over in his mind. “I know,” he says softly, “and I’m sorry but. I just can’t leave, not yet.”

“Why?” Nick says sternly, and Pig looks up at Louis with her big brown eyes and Louis is _tired_.

“Because Pig asked me not to,” Louis says, and closes his eyes.

“ _What_?” Nick says, laughing. “Are you serious right now?”

“Yes,” Louis says, still not opening his eyes. “Pig asked me to stay until the thunderstorm is over.”

“Am I expected to believe this?” Nick says, and his voice is awful and cutting. Any other day, and Louis would be just as mean back, but he can’t anymore.

“ _Yes_ ,” Louis says, “yes, you are. Because I can talk to animals, and when I found Pig she asked me to stay.”

There’s silence for a long moment, and then Nick says “Oh my god, you’re _serious_.” Louis crosses his arms and looks everywhere but at Nick. There’s another moment of silence, and then Nick yelps, and Louis looks back to see that Pig is now on the floor, and Nick has his hand wrapped protectively around his wrist.

“She nipped at me!” he says angrily, and on the floor Pig growls, saying “Be nice!”

“She says to be nice,” Louis says, sticking his hands in the pockets of his trackpants. Nick looks at him, completely shocked.

“What?” he says, and then looks down at Pig. _“What?”_

“She said to be nice,” Louis repeats. “She bit you because you were being mean.”

“Well,” Nick says, “tell her I’ll start being nice when you stop telling me things like you have the ability to talk to animals.”

“You could just tell her that,” Louis says, “she understands you.”

Nick makes a frustrated noise and drags his hands down his face. “I can’t believe we’re having this conversation when I’m almost naked,” he mutters, and Louis snorts. Nick peeks out at him from between his fingers. “Since when,” he asks.

“Since when what?” Louis says.

“Since when have you been able to talk to animals?” Nick says, and Louis looks down.

“Um, since I was a kid,” he answers. He figures that, if Nick’s giving him this chance to explain himself, he should be as honest as possible.

“So you’ve been talking to my dog this whole time?” Nick asks, and then he says, “Wait, no. This is stupid. I don’t believe you.”

“I could,” Louis starts, hesitant. “I could prove it to you.”

“And _how_ would you do that, Louis?” Nick asks sarcastically, and Louis just looks down at Pig.

“Pig,” he says, “could you tell me something? Something only you know about your Grimmy?”

Pig cocks her head at him. “Like a secret?”

“It doesn’t have to be a secret,” Louis says, and Nick looks at him disbelievingly, then looks down at Pig. “Just something only you know.”

Pig hums, sitting down on her butt. “Um,” she says, “he doesn’t wear clothes when no one is around.”

Louis snorts, and Nick looks up at him sharply. “What’d she say?” he asks, and Louis tells him. Nick crosses his arms. “Nope, I’ve mentioned that on the radio before, surely.”

Louis gives him a confused look. “Don’t you have any shame?” Nick just glares at him. “Fine. Pig, is there anything else?”

Pig thinks for a minute, then stands up tail wagging. “He’s got a picture of you,” she says. “It’s got both of you in it. It’s in his little table. He looks at it sometimes.”

Louis pauses, biting his lip, but Nick just looks at him expectantly. Louis turns on his heel then, heading straight for the bed. “This is a bit creepy, Nick,” Louis says, voice catching slightly as he rummages in Nick’s bedside drawer. “But I suppose talking to your boyfriends dog is creepier.” He pulls the frame out, waving it at Nick, who’s gone pale.

“Oh,” Nick says. “It was, uh. I was going to give it to you, but.” Louis nods, staring down at the selfie they’d taken on their first date. He feels the lump rise in his throat again, choking him.

“I broke up with you because,” he pauses, “because the last time I told someone that I was in a relationship with about me about the animal thing, she thought I needed help.” He looks up at Nick. “She didn’t believe me, and I was scared that you wouldn’t either, and that it would make you leave too, and I didn’t want to deal with that.” He puts the frame down on the table, face down. “I _really_ liked you, Nick,” he says, almost whispering. “I still do, if I’m being honest.”

Nick doesn’t say anything for a moment, and Louis feels his heart break all over again. He turns back around and immediately crouches, calling Pig to him. She’s still all soapy and it makes him smile. “I think I’m gonna have to break my promise,” he says to her, and she looks so sad that he has to stand up again. Nick is still standing in the doorway, looking wearily at Louis. Louis moves towards him. “I’m gonna go, now,” Louis says. “I’m glad I was able to help you find Pig.”

He goes to walk passed Nick, needing to be gone as soon as possible, when he feels a hand grab his arm. He turns around to see Nick standing, biting his lip and looking hesitant. “I don’t know about all this...magic or whatever,” he says, waving his hands around. “I always thought there was something odd about you, but I liked you too much to say anything about it.” Louis looks down at his feet, wishing Nick would just let him go. There’s another awkward pause, before Nick says “and I still like you. Quite a bit, actually.”

Louis looks up at Nick, trying to figure out how serious he’s actually being. “Are you sure?” Louis asks, and Nick nods.

“Plus,” Nick says jokingly, “I don’t think Pig would ever forgive me if I let you leave again.” And Pig barks, and then says “He’s right! I wouldn’t!” and Louis laughs dazedly and lets Nick pull him in, one hand on the small of Louis’ back.

“You’re really sure?” Louis asks again, face close to Nick’s, and Nick nods.

“It’ll take a bit of getting used to,” Nick says. “I’ve never had a superhero for a boyfriend before.”

Louis snorts. “I’m not a superhero,” he says, rolling his eyes, “unless you count like, rescuing bull terriers when their person lets them run off in a thunderstorm.”

Nick goes to pull back, protesting, but Louis doesn’t let him, arms coming up to wrap around the back of Nick’s neck and pull him down, pressing their lips together. Pig barks from behind them, jumping all over Nick’s bed and getting the sheets damp, and Nick pulls away to object, calling over his shoulder at his messy dog, and Louis laughs, leaning his forehead onto Nick’s chest.

“And what do you think you’re doing, then?” Nick asks, turning back to Louis. “Are you just going to sit back and let her do this? You speak dog!” Louis laughs again, unwinding his arms from Nick’s neck and walking towards the bathroom, calling Pig’s name over his shoulder. She immediately bounds after him, for the first time in her life going to the bath willingly, and Nick shouts.

“Are you serious? She’s just going to listen like that?”

“I don’t know, Nick,” Louis yells from the bathroom, already refilling the bathtub with new warm water, “I guess I just have a way with animals.”

 

**EPILOGUE, I GUESS**

 

“Nick, what is this?” Louis asks, feeling awkward standing in the middle of the BBC studios with a chimpanzee on his hip. “Why are we here?”

“Just trust me,” Nick says, leaning over to kiss Louis in the middle of the forehead. “Hiya, Eli, how are you?”

Eli doesn’t answer, just glares at Nick. “I had to pause _Mad Men_ to be here,” he says, and Louis winces.

“What’d he say?” Nick asks excitedly.

“He said he’s fine, thanks,” Louis says, and Nick beams. Behind Nick, Louis can see Bart scurrying all over the soundboards, and Nick’s producer Matt trying frantically to catch him. “Nick, what did I say about bringing Bart to the studio?”

“Excuse me,” Nick says, “It’s _Bartholomeu_. And he’s a valued member of the Breakfast Crew now. He’s like our mascot.”

Matt gives Louis a pleading look over Nick’s shoulder, and Louis giggles. “Whatever you say,” Louis says, “but if he gets hurt I’m taking him back to the shop.”

Nick rolls his eyes, “Like you’d ever do that, he’s a monster. Anyway, back to why you’re here.” He looks at Eli. “I have a present for you.”

“For me?” Eli says, and he brings his hand up to his chest, pointing at himself.

Nick nods. “Yeah! For you!” he says, and he herds them towards the door leading to the live lounge.

“Nick, what’s going--” Louis stops, frozen in the doorway.

“ _Oh my god_ ,” Eli says, before making a loud, unintelligible chimpanzee sound.

“Hello,” Aaron Paul says, standing up from where he’d been sitting in an extra chair.

“That’s Aaron Paul,” Louis says, looking over at Nick. Nick nods excitedly.

“That’s me,” Aaron Paul says, standing and walking over to them. “And who is this?” he says, gesturing to Eli.

“Holy shit, you’re my monkey’s favorite,” Louis says, dazedly, and Aaron Paul throws his head back and laughs. At that moment, Eli starts kicking at Louis.

“Put me _down_ , Louis, oh my god. You’re _embarrassing me_.” Louis puts him down, and he’s immediately tugging on Aaron Paul’s jeans. Eli pulls him over to the chair and, when Aaron Paul sits back down, promptly climbs into his lap. Eli starts babbling about how much he loves _Breaking Bad_ , but no one but Louis understands, so it just looks like Eli is petting and hugging Aaron Paul. It’s the cutest thing that’s ever happened on earth probably.

“So, you think he’ll like me now?” Nick says, wrapping an arm around Louis’ waist. Eli gets really passionate about the series finale, throwing his arms in the air and making a noise, and Aaron Paul laughs at him, delighted, and gives him a hug. Louis’ pretty sure Eli dies right then and there.

“You know,” Louis says, “if anything is going to do it, it’s probably this.”

Nick immediately cheers, sweeping Louis up in a hug, before walking over and suggesting Aaron Paul and Eli join him in the _Instagrim_ booth for a few pictures. As they go, Louis watches Eli look up at Nick with wide, adoring eyes, and thinks that now he could admit that Nick is perfect for him.

 

**Author's Note:**

> title comes from the song Hi, Hey There, Hello by the Mowgli's
> 
> come talk to me over on [tumblr](http://super-liam.tumblr.com)


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